Rick O'Connell

FIRST TRAILER

2008-05-19T11:50:13Z

First trailer for The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor. (and YouTube) Choice moment -->

Guy Flying Plane: I'd tell you to fasten your seatbelts, but I was too cheap to buy any! HA HA HA.
Our Hero: HA HA HA... WHY AM I LAUGHING.

Also, he's in a goddamn tuxedo I am so there.

ID Card

2008-01-27T01:48:40Z

Oh, Hollywood

2007-08-06T12:09:59Z

I have finally bought a magazine with something in it about The Mummy 3. HERE IS THE ARTICLE IN QUESTION.

Basically it tells us that the next Mummy film:
- will be set after WWII
- will be set in China
- will have Alex as an adult (which will hopefully make him less annoying)
- will have Maria Bello as Evelyn instead of Rachel Weisz
- might possibly involve a fight scene on the Great Wall of China
- will have Jonathan in it (but no word on Ardeth Bay)

However, the most important part? The new undead emperor will be played by JET LI.

THAT'S RIGHT. BRENDAN FRASER VERSUS JET LI.

I am already excited, even though it could easily be crap.

YOUTUBE CLIPS

2007-07-01T07:48:15Z

So The Mummy and The Mummy Returns are movies. This means I will not be pimping them to you, since you can easily go rent them or see them on tv whenever the hell they get screened. But, YouTube has a few scenes up, so if you've not seen it and want to see some, here we go!

These are in completely random order.

- Four clips in one
The following happens in this edited mix:
1) Rick runs into Imhotep (aka the mummy) for the first time, yells at him and shoots him in the face.
2) Rick hunts down Benny and smacks him around. A lot. Chair-throwing might be involved.
3) Imhotep throws up a huge sandstorm, thus Rick would like the plane to go faster plz.
4) Jonathon is an idiot and summons more mummies. Rick accordingly runs the hell away.

- The Mummy opening, part the first
Opening of the film, in which there is a lot of Ancient Egyptian backstory that involves stabbing people and being mummified alive. There is a VERY DRAMATIC NARRATOR!!1

- The Mummy opening, part the second
Rick's intro, involving a big battle at the city of Hamunaptra, lots of pistol fighting, and some sand rape.

- BUGS
This scene is funsies. On the one hand, you have Rick, Evelyn and Jonathon talking mummification before accidentally whacking a sarcophagus out of the ceiling, and on the other hand, you have the fourth member of the group who's name I forget stealing some stuff off a wall before a scarab cracks out of one, burrows into his skin and then eats his brain. GOOD TIMES.

- Rick gets hanged... almost
In which... Rick gets hanged! Evelyn bargains for his life though and they cut him down before he dies. \o/

- I have come to kiss your women while they sleep
In this, Imhotep gets into Evelyn's room by turning himself into sand, then proceeds to kiss her and ROT HIS FACE OFF. Rick barges in, throws a cat at him, and saves the day. Indeed I was not kidding when I said he fights with cats.

- Faito faito
This is the same scene that you get at the end of edited clip I linked above, but this is much longer and shows the whole fight. There is lots of mummy killing, dramatic music, and Jonathon failing at the Egyptian language.

- Evelyn the librarian
My wife is a brilliant librarian. Observe as she completely destroys every bookshelf singlehandedly.

- Evelyn hears noises in the library
Immediately follows last scene. My wife's brother is a dick.

- Benny meets Imhotep
Benny runs into Imhotep and proceeds to invoke every god imaginable to save his own life. One of them actually works.

-----

- Nefertiri vs. Anck-su-namun
So The Mummy Returns is kinda silly and features a lot of PAST LIVES. This scene features Evelyn's past life as the Pharaoh's daughter, Nefertiri, fighting Anck-su-namun in ancient Egyptian battle bikinis. Later she witnesses the same scene from the opening of the first movie. IT'S ALSO GOT ARDETH BAY IN IT AND HE'S VERY HOT. WATCH IT FOR HIM.

- The Mummy Returns opening
IT'S THE ROCK. This time in Egyptian Backstory Land, we find out about the Scorpion King waging war against Thebes, making a deal with Anubis and generally failing at war.

- Golden pyramids and oasises
LOOK GUYS IT'S ARDETH BAY AGAIN. AND AN OASIS. AND A GOLD PYRAMID. OH SHIT A WALL OF WATER IS RAPING OUR DIRIGIBLE.

- Are we theeeeere yeeeeeet
In which Alex (Rick and Evie's son) is very, very annoying.

- Pygmy mummies
Most of this scene features Jonathon being his usual lunatic self, but it also has some plot, and some dynamite.

- Uh...
Basically? Imhotep goes NOOOOOOOOOOOOO. In Egyptian.

It's really hard to find clips that aren't music videos. :/ Will add more if I find them.

Stats/Permissions

2007-06-30T11:25:37Z

Name: Rick O'Connell
Age: Not stated, but I'll roughly say 37-ish by the time of the sequel.
Hair: Brown
Eyes: Blue
Height: 6'3" (191cm)
Weight: 85kgs or so (MADE UP)
Bloodtype: O.

Medical info: So Rick's been in a fair few gun fights and been kicked around a lot, so I'd say he's got the requisite small scars and banged-up-ness you get from being a SOLDIER in EGYPT and a FIGHTER OF THE UNDEAD!!1 Basically normal though. MY FIRST COMPLETELY NORMAL HUMAN PERSON \o/

Physical Traits: So uh, Brendan Fraser is apparently really tall! I was not aware of this until I hit up IMDb just now. I assume he's decently built since he does so much running around and fighting, but he's not completely ripped or anything. You can probably assume he has at least two pistols and a rifle on him at all times, if not more. He usually wears clothes in varying states of tan or brown; shirt, pants, gun holsters, and knee high boots are the main parts. I never know what to put here har har. Oh yeah, he also has an Egyptian tattoo under a leather band on his right wrist. He doesn't usually take it off though, so you'd probably know if he was showing it off.

What's Okay to Mention: Pretty much anything. It's likely that SOMEONE in camp will go "omg Brendan Fraser" at him, and I don't mind that. Bring up anything from the films if you like too, but KEEP IN MIND that I haven't seen The Scorpion King or watched the cartoon, so I won't get references for those and neither will Rick.

Notes For the Psychics: Pfft nothing. Rick is an open book and isn't someone who has a completely different identity on the inside. What you see is what you get.

Abilities: NORMAL HUMAN. He's good at firing guns, swinging swords, and running like hell. That's about it, unless you count sarcasm skillz.

Shapeshift/bodyswap/etc.: Sure, go nuts!

Hugging/Kissing: WHY WOULD YOU, HE'S MARRIED. >/// But sure, go for it.

Fighting: Yeah, he's good for fighting, but keep in mind he's in no way special or powerful. Unlike Wolfwood, if he gets shot? HE WILL ACTUALLY DIE OR STOP MOVING.

Maiming/Killing/Death: I think I'll say no to this. My other characters are freaks who I'll probably jump into fights with more, so Rick'll sit the maiming/death bandwagon out.

Cooking: You know, I have to assume he can cook SOMETHING. Roasting stuff over an open fire and all that.

Appity

2007-06-30T10:09:15Z

Character: Rick O’Connell
Series: The Mummy and The Mummy Returns
Age: Mid-to-late thirties
Job: Undead Slaying Instructor
Canon: Once upon a time in ancient Egypt, a high priest was very naughty and thus turned into a cursed mummy. Fast forward to 1926: a librarian, her brother and an American accidentally wake him up and trigger a world-ending apocalypse. Oops. They do manage to defeat him, which means that when someone else resurrects the mummy again in the sequel a few years later, they are less than impressed. So they defeat him again, with the combined powers of ancient Egyptian knowledge, wisecracks, and the occasional bumbling shenanigan that works in their favour.

Rick O’Connell is the American in this equation, hired by librarian (and future wife) Evie to help them find the city of Hamunaptra. A man with no shortage of sarcastic quips for whatever situation he’s in, O’Connell would rather not go poking the ancient curse-ridden tombs, but you know how things go. As such he often finds himself fighting off hordes of the undead with guns, swords, dynamite, and sometimes a cat. He’s also a big fan of running the hell away when the odds aren’t so good. In the end he’s a brave fellow who refuses to let anyone try to destroy the world or sacrifice people, even if they ARE a 3000-year-old sacred walking corpse. That just makes it a bit harder.

Sample Post:

Okay, am I here yet? I’d better be, because if I’m not I might just have to hike back through the swamp to beat the guy selling the maps. I’m sure he’s a responsible business man but any map that tells me to turn right at the volcano, then follows that up with “No, your other right” isn’t reassuring. So, let’s see… some cabins and swampland sounds right. Not too sure the gorillas replacing that sign are, though. What the hell does it say… if that big one would just move a bit then I could-- oh, wait.

"Ye Old Campe Fuckery: Undergoing renovations in 2007 for a new generation of the damned, the lost, and the terminally emo." I’ll take that as a yes, then.

Since this is the place, that’d make me your undead slaying instructor. Now I don’t know where this Director lady got the idea that I’m any good at that, because anyone with half a brain knows that the undead are pretty good at not dying. But when someone kidnaps you from your home and dumps you at the edge of a swamp, well, you pay attention. Especially when a bunch of little dead guys start singing "Hi-ho, hi-ho, it’s off to hell you go" at you. Which means I’m gonna at least give this a shot, so pay attention and you might learn something. And even if you don’t, well, pay attention anyway. I’m serious. You can tell I’m serious because I lost one of my boots back in the swamps and kept on marching, boot-less, and even kicked one’ve those singing guys in the face with my bare foot. And he was pretty dopey. If that doesn’t say serious, I don’t know what does.

So over here we’ve got some dead guys. Not the kind of dead guys I’m used to, but that doesn’t matter much. They’re still juicy and falling to bits, just don’t have any bandages keeping them together or… covering anything. I really did not need to know that they have three extra cheeks. Now, what you have to do with these is kill them. Crazy, I know, but work with me here. You can hack ‘em to bits except that doesn’t really stop those bits moving. Like that hand over there, giving me the finger, or those intestines tying themselves into a pretty bow.

Best thing to do? Shoot them in the face. And if that doesn’t work… shoot them in the face again. They’re probably still crawling around on the floor trying to rip your toenails off, but the shooting will continue until morale improves. Try to hit them in the mouth too; I can see some of ‘em starting to chant and believe me, chanting isn’t a good thing. Even if they are chanting "The baby is okay". So just stomp on all those pieces, because I can see them all crawling together into something else, and it could be pretty bad or it could end up as--

A giant zombie baby.

O…kay then. This might be a problem. Forget the guns, we’ll need something bigger for this. I need you kids to find some dynamite, an Egyptologist, ancient giant-monster-killing trinkets, and a knife. I know some of that stuff isn’t easy to find, but don’t worry.

I can do it without the knife.

((Voting went here: 89.8% in, g-god.))